It seems like summer always keeps me away from this lovely place. Or being busy. Or living life instead of writing about it. Or just updating Keeg's blog instead of my own (hey, any opportunity I have to send people there, I'll take it).
Anyway. I included a picture for you today! I got my har did. Yep- I'm still using that Cedar City slang (as Xander calls it).
I miss lil CC! It's been about a month and a half (holy cow!) since I've been to my college home. It's so weird! I know that the past few summers have been this way- being in Murray and not Cedar I mean- but it recently hit me that I won't be going back.
Like most people, I always say I will visit, but will it really happen? I'm working my HR Specialist job ( I have an assistant and everything- yeah, like an adult job!), I'm "working" my writing job for Dr. Carmel White (I'll soon be a published author in the Journal of Child and Family Studies, fingers crossed), and I'm working on those mission papers. Do I have time to visit? Well...
I guess we make time for those things that matter most to us right? I will be in Cedar again sometime this summer, I promised my half that I would, but sometimes it feels like summer is slipping through my fingers.
I've had a bit of a ward mix-up since I've been home (which one can I attend? Which one do I belong in? Where do I feel the best? AH! CONFLICTED!) and on this last Sunday I cried and cried and cried because all I wanted was to be back in my Cedar City ward. Whether the10th ward or the 20th ward, I always felt like I belonged there. Heck, even in the 21st ward when I thought I didn't fit, my bishopric was still aware of my needs. I got really close with my bishops, I felt like I was contributing significantly to the ward efforts, and I felt like I had a REAL ward family there.
Sitting in my family ward I'm just reminded that I'm between phases. It's not my favorite (as I've mentioned previously), but I'm figuring it out. I love my family ward, don't get me wrong, I just feel like I don't have anything to give them. I don't have kids, I'm not married, I can't start any stories with "when my daughter was such and such age, me and my husband did this and that..." Most of my stories start with "When I was in institute...." or "living with roommates I learned..." and what the heck can people learn from that? Nada. They all have so much more experience and so much more to tell us, what could they possibly learn from a little college girl who is flying by the seat of her pants most days?
Like I said, conflicted.
What am I gonna do without SUU to keep me grounded? I love my job, I am having a blast with my family, and I'm excited for my mission (although my papers are taking longer than I thought), but how can I be done with college already?! Yikes. It's not so much the end of classes that worries me as much as the end of my circles down there. I know I'll make new circles, I always have, but it's weird to be away. It's OVER.
Sad thought. But, as a good friend of mine used to say "keep on keepin' on."
I'll keep moving forward, even when it feels like time flies by and I get left in the dust. I'll keep moving forward even though I'm not sure where forward is yet. I'll keep preparing for that mission I'm going on even when it feels like obstacles are popping up all over the place. I'll "keep on keepin' on."
Thanks for reading!
(oh, and don't forget to enjoy the links in blue, I had fun with them!)