In my Comm. class we've been talking about close relationships, and it made me wonder: where is the "family" going?
From what I can tell, family is going through a bit of an identity crisis. Don't get me wrong- it's important to love people of all kinds and include them in your family (my extended family is really good at this and I love them for it!!) but family relationships should be better and not so messy.
An Example of a Messy Family Relationship:
Some Sad Statistics:
53% of marriages end in divorce nationwide.
38% of second marriages end in divorce.
11% of married people are unhappy.
In addition to these numbers, I've learned that more people are living together without getting married and people who do get married are very likely to be unfaithful at least once. Most divorces are derived from money problems, infidelity, or other sexual relations (namely pornography).
What is happening here??!??!!!
Society is more and more tolerant of the diverse family systems and the nuclear family known in 1956 is virtually disappearing.
What does this mean for my future? It means I'll continue to be part of the minority in the world. Family is the most important thing in my life. I want kids, I want a husband, I want to be sealed to the people I love most. Putting my personal goals aside for a minute.... all you readers out there- listen up! We cannot raise the next generation in broken homes. Think about it.....
Right now people want 2.5 kids or less.
Odds are that they're kids will want 1 child or no children.
Odds are that they're kid will want 1 child or no children.....
How far will it go before we stop having kids at all? That's a bit extreme, but the family unit is still under attack.
Rochelle and I were talking about Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's family the other day (see this link) and we wondered what things are like for them considering that they aren't married. It's so sad to think that that family could break up on a whim with no strings attached (relatively speaking). It's just a mess!
What do we do?
1. We get married.
It's so much more than living together- it's a commitment that brings countless opportunities for selfless service to your spouse and kids.
2. We Raise Kids in a Loving Home.
Children shouldn't have to suffer for their parents mistakes, nor should they be blamed for things that are beyond their cognitive abilities. One of the biggest fears we have as individuals is the fear of rejection. This fear should NEVER touch your family members. Every member needs to be loved unconditionally.
3. We Communicate!
One of the reasons that families don't stay together is because they aren't communicating effectively. This is what I will be helping families with when I grow up. People need to talk through everything. Communication isn't the solve-all solution, but it's a place to start. If you communicate effectively within your family you will have closer relationships.
The best answer to this problem can be found in this amazing document. Read it. Enjoy it. Share it. Protect the lives of your future family members by living in a way that will support healthy and strong relationships. Make the commitment because the happiness of others is far more important than being selfish.
We can save "family" from this identity crisis.
Thanks for reading!